Becoming… Beckoned

Posted on by Gary Fultz

With dawn breaking darkness my woods walk found me pondering one of life’s questions. “Why am I not enough?” If I telescope the universe, I am small. I cannot blip the “important” scale, or any other. It’s really quite simple. I am not enough.

Silk worm (like me) just hanging in there…

I find ways to be important. Causes, being a voice, influencing, money, power and being bigger-better-smarter than “those”. All zeros as life slips into the ultimate irony when all my numbers and zeros are worth…”ZERO” I cannot be enough.

As my walk nears the open field, I can barely see the sun through the fog. The sun, much bigger than me. No life without the sun. No questions without the sun. Enough to see. Enough to be. Why do I think there’s more?

It’s sad when two are not enough for each other. One cannot deny the divorce commonness. Deflections, clamoring’s and finger-pointing abounds when nothing can fill the voids of life. Even in mourning I still find myself collecting grief shells in a small overflowing time bucket. It’s written in the DNA; No one is enough.

I gaze at the sun gradually melting the fog. The Son. Predictions and promises of enough. “I am The Way, The Truth and The Life. NO ONE come to the Father (ENOUGH) but through Me”

So I, in dew drenched knees, dump out my “enough” bucket of shells, trinkets, plastic trophies, grief shells, aspirations, zeros and accolades. I reach for the outstretched hand of the Son and hear the familiar “follow me”. I leave my bucket. I smile as an odd thot crosses my mind, “I am filled with enough and have plenty to share”. The next time I walk by my old bucket I may just kick it.

“Whoever has the Son has life (ENOUGH); whoever does not have the Son of God does not have life” 1 John 5:12

I have found I am not enough, but walking, talking and being fulfilled in a relationship Jesus is my enough.

Gary

Being OK

Posted on by Gary Fultz

Our furnace quit as the outside weather decided to sit at -25 (f). The first “emergency” furnace guy didn’t have the right igniter. The second “emergency” furnace guy didn’t either, but he banged on a bracket with a hammer to make a “close enough” igniter long enough to spark in the “propane path”. HIs parting words were “it works for now; we will let you know when the right part comes in.” Meanwhile, I get to choose how much to worry or not. I have thoughts about how to protect our handicapped daughter’s inability to control her bodies temperature as well as freezing the waterpipes in the house. A bridge to cross if another emergency happens. I now have 5 electric heaters I can borrow and use in case of another emergency. I’m also going to have a spare igniter handy.

In northern Minnesota it’s wise to be prepared for extreme weather. One can blame the weather for life problems only so far. I like to define “the weather” as the circumstances we live in today. Our political circumstances, choices made by our leaders, choices made by our neighbors and even crimes that affect us is a part of “the weather” and climate we live in. It’s life. It’s always been that way in every time and culture that has ever lived.

Some of our winter weather coping pictures…we are ok. I keep some outdoor Christmas till Easter…The birds and squirrels add to the decor.

I like nice weather. I like comfort. It’s attractive. While we hit our high weather temperature today of -6 (f), my wife was browsing at condos on a warm beach on the internet and checking the numbers in our savings. “Wow they all look new” she said. “that’s because they just built them after the last hurricane” I said.

I cannot help but feel very blessed. Despite “the weather” of life I have a wife who loves me, Great kids and grandkids, Knowing God loves me and wants to shepherd me through all life’s weather. I have been reading and rereading Psalm 23. A simple psalm with layers and layers of depth, laced with scriptural threads of truths about our Shepherd weathering us through life. I also want to share the best book I have used in going through Psalm 23 by Brian Troxel from “A Word In Season.” Go to Brians site, sign up for his Blog and buy some books to read and give away.

You will want to buy extra for gifts. Trust me on this one…Depths shared simply.

My last thought about being ready for “the weather”. One should walk with God and let his spirit make us ready for anything. His fruit is much better than what the world tells us how to believe and behave. Galatians 5:22-23: “ But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.”

I hope you are wintering and weathering well.

Gary

Another Dimension

Posted on by Gary Fultz

Awhile back I was the speaker for a church fish fry. I was supposed to tell some fishing stories, share some fishing tips and present a challenge for each individual to know where they stood in a relationship with God. I didn’t really know anyone. I quickly sized up the rough and tumble group and concluded that a relationship with God might be another dimension for at least some of them (Yep, I judged them, and told some of my tips and stories).

After I spoke, a man leaned both hands on the table by me. With a low voice he said, “I brought my fishing buddy here tonight. You said all the words he needed to hear”. The room was filled with people around tables talking in subdued tones with some good laughter now and then. I noticed the stark contrast. The beginning of the evening, leading up to the church fish fry, was full of loud boastful voices with some serious put-downs. The winds of thought had brought us as a group to another place. A good place. Another dimension of relationship. God was involved. “A miracle happened” I thought.

“Will your friend listen to those words?” I asked. His reply was immediate…”I’m going to find out”

Concerning many relationships, what we want to hear is often so different than what we need to hear. When we begin to talk about having a relationship with God, it’s like going to another dimension. Many will not go there. Those of us who have a right relationship with God experience the initial changes as well as the gradual transformed life. God’s agenda for us, as we walk with him, is becoming more like Jesus.

I’m still pondering the dynamics, from start to finish, of a small group of mostly guys at a church fish fry. It seemed the whole group went to another dimension, or at least stood by the opened portal-door. Yes, last night I observed the secret to world peace, in those finding personal peace with God. The church seemed more peaceful. As I walked out to find my car, 2 Corinthians 5:17 came to mind…“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, they are a new creation (as in new species) : old things have passed away, behold, all things have become new!

What a fun evening. New friends, good food, lots of stories and laughter, God moved in people’s lives. I’m quite familiar with this dimension in everyday life. Another dimension? Only if a relationship with God is not a part of your everyday life.

…Sigh, I just realized I forgot to tell my big fish, no net, from a canoe on 10 lb test-story….huh

Gary

Uh-Oh

Posted on by Gary Fultz

Uh-oh, was the name of our handicapped daughters first doll. Poor dolly had a lot of those moments, so the expression stuck. Ironically, that was the same expression uttered by the attending doctor when our middle daughter was born. He quickly noticed the purplish bulb on her back containing the unfinished spinal column.

I uttered uh-oh 3 days ago while sawing firewood with the chain saw as I lost control of my legs and fell forward towards the running saw. My back had suddenly gone out of place and my limbs instantly quit working. Thankfully my thumb was by the shut off and the saw quit immediately.

After 3 days, I am finally able to walk with help. Actually, I call it the four-inch-sideways shuffle. My wife thinks we are dancing. This uh-oh is painful and slow healing. I am hoping to be able to get in a car and ride to a chiropractor this next week, which will be painful. I tell myself it’s a good pain. I tell myself I will go back to doing what I have been doing. Soon. Maybe. Have a look at some pictures of my doings in semi-retirement. Click to enlarge. I wish the fish got bigger that way…

My year has been filled with able bodied tasks, till now. Cutting and splitting firewood, cutting out wood plaques, making a covered home for the snowblower attachment to the skid steer, ice fishing, cleaning up the woods from dead standing and fallen trees, grilling, making jerky and planning more wilderness canoe treks. The list goes on. Those plans are on hold, if and until I get my body back to being able. I think I have been taking the able body thing for granted more than I thought. An accident-prone person ought to know better.

Meanwhile, I am getting claustrophobic in a body that can’t do anything or go anywhere, yet I am really good and content inside. My wife loves me, possibly too much for her own good (I chose well, we have grown well together). I’m accepting of the possibility that my life’s plans and even passions may take a back seat to reality. My wife and I talk of how many hard things have happened to us and also how much of our lives have been enriched and blessed in spite of the hard things. I see these tensions that seem to combat one another, how good they are and understand that all the contentment comes from many years of having a right relationship with God. No other explanation exists. I’m overwhelmed and good inside. I sometimes struggle with the right words or word pictures, but it’s important. How many people can get to be content inside themselves with this crazy upside-down world? I say we all could.

Everyone has a pail full of faith. Everyone’s pail seems to be a different size. Some have filled their pail with themself. Their opinions, learnings, education, perceived facts and experiences and whoever they may listen to in doing life. They may be labeled atheist, agnostic, or whatever, but they live by faith. Religious people live by faith. Some have a bucket full of beliefs, rules, people they follow and a perceived way to live like God wants them to believe and live. Much of the world is a combination of both. I would also dare to guess that many do not know what’s in their faith bucket, and some don’t care. We sit in a chair believing it will hold us up. In money some trust (if I could just go viral,,,) and life would go well.

The object of our faith is important. I know that I am not enough. I don’t belong in my faith bucket. Right now, I can’t walk across the room without help. Jesus said “I am the way, the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father but through me.” He addressed the what’s in your faith bucket. Millions of books are written on why and how Jesus needs to fill our faith bucket while so many people stuff their faith bucket full of books and a bible that talks about it (ugh, there are so many ways to try to be God).

A part of eternity is lived here, day by day. Someday when we are gone from here, there will be a moment when we make eye contact with the king of kings. The one who died for our sins so we could be declared perfect to God. Will this king have that tinge of recognition in his eyes, or will we be seen as a stranger? He will only invite those he knows inside forever. It will be beyond important then, which makes it important now.

I still do not enjoy uh-oh’s, but in the context of life and where I’m sitting, I’m really doing well. My pail of faith may be way less than the size of a mustard seed, but I want only Jesus in it. Whether I live in pain or die in luxury, I am really alive because of Jesus.

Her middle name is Joy.

37 surgeries at this time,

some life flights, lots of pain.

A radiant smile. coincidence? I think not.

Gary

Some of you have a great Bible verse or passage, so post in comments.

Finding The Source

Posted on by Gary Fultz

“I want what you and M have.”

He poked at the campfire ashes, revealing the live coals under layers of ash. “How symbolic” I thought.

“You guys are Christian. I’ve been thinking of converting to Christianity, but I don’t want church like my relatives. I don’t want to be like them. I want what you got.”

“What do we have?” I asked. “I don’t know, but I want it. I have to find it because that’s what I am missing. I know that it has to do with God and I know that you and M have it.”

A long talk ensued about the difference between having a relationship with God and being religious. One is becoming like God while the other is full of rhetoric and just believes strongly. One knows inner peace in the midst of chaos, a deep joy in the midst of sorrow as well as laughter, Love for more than those who are close (even one’s enemy), patience that grows with time, hope in and beyond this life, thankfulness and a heart for mankind and generations to come. Things that are not natural to our nature

God knows everything about us, down to the heart’s deepest motives, but He cannot have a relationship with us unless we have a relationship with Him. It takes two.

How can we explain, much less understand, a God who would become human to die in our place out of his immense love for restoring his creation into deep relationship again.

The opposite is often the truth. This world is a place where the deceiver would make honest liars of us all. Where good is bad, lovers are called haters and opinions trump reality.

He poked the stick at the ashes mounding over the glowing coals. He was done for now. “How symbolic” I thought.

“You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.” (Jeremiah 29:13)

Street sign obscured by snow…Yes, how symbolic!

Gary

Fixing My Eyes

Posted on by Gary Fultz

“Another crossroads Buddy” I murmured to the little dog as we turned around and headed home. Life is full of them. I don’t live in regret but if I had do-overs I would choose the “other path” on a few of them. There is one path that has been my best choice ever. Following Jesus has brought me the greatest spouse and marriage one could have as well as someone infinitely bigger than me guiding through life. Years ago I put it to music. My musical crossroads, do I keep it in the basement or share. I’ll share. It’s not everyone’s style but that’s Ok.

Song of Hebrews 12:1-2 Personalized. I have put it to music, demo quality. I thought it was time to share.

Click here and hit the little arrow.

Lyrics

Fixing My Eyes

(Hebrews 12:1-2)

  1.   Alone I stood before the crowd.

 Afraid, I said a prayer aloud,

Lord I can’t run the race before me.

So I’m staring down some winding trails.

I must run where others have failed

Follow the Son, He’s gone before me.

        Chorus:

 I’m fixing my eyes on Jesus. Never look back, straight ahead.

Fixing my eyes on Jesus, don’t want to lose sight of my guide.

       I hear the ones who have gone on before…

       Never Give up, don’t look around, straight ahead.

       Never Give up, don’t look around, straight ahead

  •   Sometimes I’m lost, sometimes turned around

And it seems that my Lord’s no-where to be found

I feel all alone on a dead end trail.

That’s when I look for the Son, I call for my guide

Fall on my knees and give up my pride.

Then I hear a voice say “Follow Me”

        Chorus:

 I’m fixing my eyes on Jesus. Never look back, straight ahead.

Fixing my eyes on Jesus, don’t want to lose sight of my guide.

               I hear the ones who have gone on before…

              Never Give up, don’t look around, straight ahead

              Never Give up, don’t look around, straight ahead.

  • Alone I stood before the throne. I fall before the awesome king. What he thinks of me is all I am.

I see two roads of eternity, the crowd is hushed and I hear him say “well done, come live with me”

Words and music by Gary Fultz

I’m older but I still play keyboards and write music, usually when no one is around. A bit like the song bird in the woods.

Gary

Account Settled

Posted on by Gary Fultz

I leaned against the counter in the local building center as the salesman, a friend, said “I have a story for you.” He rang up my bill as I said “put it on my wife’s account.” He chuckled “Ok, it looks like she has a credit on her account so that’s a good deal. It’s already paid!”

“The story?” I asked? (In the salesman’s words)”Yes. I just played piano for a funeral of one of your distant relatives. He would have been your mothers cousin. He had heart problems, surgery and then was doing really well but died suddenly. A couple days before he died, his son was visiting and asked his dad if he had ever settled his accounts with God. He said no I don’t think so. His son then told him about sin separating us from God, an unpayable debt. Jesus dying and paying the price with his life for our sin and offering everyone a restored relationship with God, he just had to receive that gift God offers us, a restored relationship with him now and forever. Yep, when he realized God had already paid for his account to be settled, he believed and wanted to pray and ask Jesus into his life…just like that. He died a couple days later. Peaceful, his son said”

I pondered the story of my distant relatives son, about my age, finally sharing the gospel with his dad, as I was excited to share my latest pictures with friends and siblings. Knowing God, just the possibility of his guidance and knowing that kind of love in my life is the most exciting thing one can ever know. Ironically, coincidence? I think not, my pictures fit the story here. take a look at pictures and explanations.

These are the last ermine tracks made before the ermine was raptered (ya, play on word for some of you). He was hopping along and an owl carried him away. The final side slots in the snow, coming towards us, is wing tips pushing up. He’s gone.

Guess who took over the ermine tunnels in the snow? This red squirrel wasted no time. If he stays there, well, the owl is watching.
Nearby in the woods: the final resting place for an old white tail buck. A stop-over resting place for birds like this downy woodpecker. The old weeds have died but their seeds will replant in the spring.

I took these pictures at the warmest part of the day (-9F) with a bitter cold wind chill of -30F. The squirrel held his paws as if cold and would not leave his warm tunnel under the snow. As it got colder through the day, 6 deer came and laid in the snow by our garden shed in the sun out of the wind. They just hope to survive the winter.

Today, I was reminded that so many people just go through life with an unclaimed gift they forget about. A gift better than the biggest winning lottery ticket ever. A now and forever gift.

So today I ask you if you have accepted God’s offer of a relationship with him. Now and forever. I’m asking about a relationship that God sought with us through Jesus. Here’s a start for looking further

Gary

I think often of you Kim. So sorry. You asked me why I was so happy and I blew it. I could have taken the time to share

There’s More

Posted on by Gary Fultz

This, after reading Cindy’s post realchristianwomen.blog/2023/01/06/fridays-verse-1-6-23/
   

I had clicked on Cindy’s post and notice she used a picture I had taken from a boat by the Apostle Islands in lake Superior. When I read the bible verse she had posted I got excited. Not only did the verse fit the picture really well, but there was so much more to what she was posting. More than Cindy could know and more than the reader could know. Take a look and read the verse.

“Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love,
    for I have put my trust in you.
Show me the way I should go,
    for to you I entrust my life.” Psalm 143:8 NIV

Here is what no one else knew. The rock in the picture is one of the outermost apostle Islands. The area is dangerous for big ships in the dark or any weather with low visibility. I also took a picture of what is on top of the rock.

In matters of God and faith, there’s more. Only because God is so much beyond our wildest imaginations is there more when we completely trust him. Those who have walked in that kind of faith have stories of God’s leading, guidance and provision. Someday they may find out how much more there was to their stories. God leads us into so much more when we follow him.

I remember telling someone who had fallen on some very desperate times “don’t worry, trust me when I tell you that God is working behind the scenes” They did not know several of us had already raised the money to take care of the issue. I could say with 100% certainty that God was taking care of them because I was in on the solution. Jesus said a lot of things to his disciples with 100% certainty. God’s promises come from 100% certainty for those who will know him, follow him and live by faith.

Now you know why I got excited. I knew about the lighthouse. In matters of life, faith and God, there is so much more. I’m 100% sure.

“Eye has not seen, nor ear heard, Nor have entered into the heart of man. The things which God has prepared for those who love Him.” 1 Corinthians 2:9

Check out Cindy’s blog here

Gary