Becoming… Beckoned

With dawn breaking darkness my woods walk found me pondering one of life’s questions. “Why am I not enough?” If I telescope the universe, I am small. I cannot blip the “important” scale, or any other. It’s really quite simple. I am not enough.

Silk worm (like me) just hanging in there…

I find ways to be important. Causes, being a voice, influencing, money, power and being bigger-better-smarter than “those”. All zeros as life slips into the ultimate irony when all my numbers and zeros are worth…”ZERO” I cannot be enough.

As my walk nears the open field, I can barely see the sun through the fog. The sun, much bigger than me. No life without the sun. No questions without the sun. Enough to see. Enough to be. Why do I think there’s more?

It’s sad when two are not enough for each other. One cannot deny the divorce commonness. Deflections, clamoring’s and finger-pointing abounds when nothing can fill the voids of life. Even in mourning I still find myself collecting grief shells in a small overflowing time bucket. It’s written in the DNA; No one is enough.

I gaze at the sun gradually melting the fog. The Son. Predictions and promises of enough. “I am The Way, The Truth and The Life. NO ONE come to the Father (ENOUGH) but through Me”

So I, in dew drenched knees, dump out my “enough” bucket of shells, trinkets, plastic trophies, grief shells, aspirations, zeros and accolades. I reach for the outstretched hand of the Son and hear the familiar “follow me”. I leave my bucket. I smile as an odd thot crosses my mind, “I am filled with enough and have plenty to share”. The next time I walk by my old bucket I may just kick it.

“Whoever has the Son has life (ENOUGH); whoever does not have the Son of God does not have life” 1 John 5:12

I have found I am not enough, but walking, talking and being fulfilled in a relationship Jesus is my enough.

Gary

24 thoughts on “Becoming… Beckoned

  1. Beautifully written Gary … been there and often still am at times, but like you find assurance knowing He is all I need to be enough, and is always there … and will be when I finally ‘kick the bucket’ for the last time to spend Eternity with Him.

    Be Blessed brother, and …

    Keep Looking Up ^ … His Best is Yet to Come!

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  2. Powerful and honest. We’re not enough on our own, but in Jesus we find what truly fills the emptiness.

    Let go of the “bucket” of achievements and pain, reach for Him, and you’ll have more than enough to share.

    Be Blessed and Continue to be a Blessing.

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  3. Amen to that Gary. Thanks. How you doing? It’s been a while. I know you’ve been digging out since the storm and imagine you’ve got much done. Whether you meant it this way or not, it sounds like a great walk in the woods. You are blessed to have such a place. I would think you’ve got the start of a good autumn beginning going by now. Regarding the math, the Lord always completes the equation. He also always does His part. When we do ours we are both enough, as in the yoked-together sense. He sometimes has to pull us along, of course, but is always there for the committed and true follower. I was never much on the so-called rewards one gains in this life including of the spiritual variety. Whatever we may gain will eventually be cast to the Lord as in the crown variety because He is worthy of all. He is also the most humble of all. And faithful.

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    1. Thanks RJ. Yes, I have opted to spend the summer on clean up and mostly off grid. The Lord does complete us. A close friend had a talk with me about my absence of blogging. It’s an ongoing conversation as taking someone fishing (among one of several things) has lately been higher on my list of things I might do. Yet, what God is doing in our lives should be shared at whatever level we are urged within to share.

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    1. Thanks Jon. I do like the word “meditation” rather than “blog”. Fitting. Also fitting as you understand the depth of relationship God desires to have with us as well as the lengths He has gone and will go for us to know Him, HIs ways, and be in tune with HIs spirit. I wonder how big His joy desired compares to our joy realized.

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  4. You are so right! In Christ, we are more than enough. The thing I like best is that we get a new bucket each day. 🙂 As scripture promises, God does make all things new, and His mercies are new each morning. (Lamentations 3: 22-23) We get older, and we may get tired at times. Still, God loves us now as He has since before our birth and He will love us that same way through all eternity. So, in reality, we get a shiny new bucket each day to fill out of sheer gratitude to God for His abundant love and mercy.

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  5. My ‘bucket idea’ is to fill it with good things…gratitude, praise to God, the everyday miracles of life. It is just another way of looking at the bucket. 🙂 (I wasn’t sure that I explained that well enough!!!

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    1. Great thoughts Linda. My problem is hanging on to the old bucket of stuff I don’t want to give up…and I don’t grab the new bucket each day…you would think I would like the new Shiney one each new day…you are so right…thanks

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  6. The recognition of God’s presence with us each new morning. Priceless!
    So why do I get drawn away so easily to play in the mud of the back alley instead of accepting His invitation of a sunny day playing in the sun and waves of the seashore? Lord, help me recognize Your presence this day too.

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